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Im Cooler Than You'll Ever Be...
And You Know It's True...
Created on 2005-10-01 23:22:55 (#8434907), last updated 2007-07-22
27 comments received, 156 comments posted
Basic Account [Gift]
23 Journal Entries, 0 Tags, 62 Memories, 0 Virtual Gifts, 2 Userpics
Basic Info| Name: | ~*Miss420*~ |
|---|---|
| Birthdate: | 01-01 |
| Location: | Florida, United States |
Bio»·´¨`»**Umpy'z Profile**«·´¨`«
°o O º(¸.·'´(¸.·'´ `'·.¸)`'·.¸)º O o°
i live in a box...yes a box...now i don't mean to brag but my box...yes MY box..is magic!i found it one day after selling my last ounce of coke outside on Bayshore.Now i had stolen a hairy hotdog from another bum earlier that day,and i was gettin preettttty hungry by now and then i seen it..sittin right there full of mushrooms!well you can bet i snatched that bitch right up and ran as fast as i could but with one problem...the people that had left it out was chaseing me with a gun!! stoopid bastard hit me in the back of my head but like i said the stoopid bastard thought that was an inportant part of my body but what he din't know was that alians had kidnapped me and teleported my brain to the testacles they had sewn to me...but anywayz i got to the train station jumped into a boxcar and here i am in sunny florida...the only real problem is i have this funny twitch in my neack,eye,and arm and woah buddy try standing in the groocry store line with your arm twitchin this way n that...yeah i get into big trouble with this arm...damn mushrooms...oh well after i ate all of the mushrooms i passed out and had the WEIREDEST dream of my life...man, after i woke up i found myself in this bothel in down town china and had been walkin around for years...man the times i had there....damn i REALLy wishiculd remember when and how i got there ohhh welll...any wayzx after that i stayed and worked as a profesional prostituite for about 3 years...all most got shot twice for not keepin a straight face ... but i mean...cum on 3 inches??? they told me i shouldn't laugh at other mens...handicaps but ummmm....well see how long you could keep a straight face lookin at that...anywayz i finally got enough money to move back here sunny fuckin naples florida... i they found out that prostitution was illleagle here and well...you can imagin... i then went through all my money and was thrown into the street and guess what?against alll odds in the world there was my box. now im homeless and o i bet you who are reading this are wondering "how is she writing all this" well it's simple... telikineisis,or better yet, brain power!!! the end .....i sware to god this is all true!...o and by the way every error or misspelt word is a result of a brain fa rt....the ...........
ok.I've been running away from these insane penguins all day.i think they might want to hurt me but umm. im not stoping to find out...anyways todays story is about this man who jumps off a cliff then lands on a plane then falls off the plane then lands in the ocean then gets swallowed by a whale then gets thrown up by a whale and finds himself on a ship in Guatomala and then in a brothel and the contracts herpes from unprotected sex over and over and after the 100th time the crabs didn't even matter ok our story starts here.....Man it's been three weeks scince i got here and these herpes and crabs combined are killing me....i wonder if the bumps are supposed to ooooz like this(opens pants and pokes at the bump) eechk...o well... man i need a smoke.......(while man stoopidly stops in the middle of the street a huge semi is comin his way....uh o to bad for the man that he can't rewind time cause i think he would go alllllll the way back......o welll...........BEEP BEEEEEP.....BEEP BEEPBEEP BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPP(SPLAT)............the end.,
ConnectInterests (49):
all things asian, art, beautiful things, books, cheeba, cigarettes, clasical music, cowboy bebop, dance, dance music, dancing, ddr, dope, dragons, fantasy, ganja, ice skateing, inuyasha, invader zim, johnny depp, johnny the homicidal maniac, jrock, jthm, kitties!!!!!!!, last exile, martial arts, metal music, most action movies, movies, outlaw star, piano, pot, r.o.d, reefer, rob zombie, rock music, sailor moon, small children, sports, squee, swimming, techno, teen titans, trigun, video games, volleyball, water, weed, white zombie
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